Deadline - How would you feel?

Today is my deadline day.

Meaning? 28 days ago I pawned my sweet laptop and today is the day I have to buy it out. Like for 332 pounds. Damn it! I do not have the money, I do not have the idea where to get the money for that. So - if to say it nicely - I'm f***ed!

The reason I took my laptop with me to UK was that I could find some personal projects with graphical or web design, to do some writing and so on. I have every program needed in my ASUS. Yes - it's still mine, but after 4,5 hours not anymore.

All kind of s*** has happened. Little good and tons of unpleasant ones.

Few days ago I wrote an essay about my current situation, and today, after I found out that I will not get my Statutory Sick Pay even in this week and all together it makes 3 weeks without any income... Well - after that note I decided to put my essay to my blog.

I will explain later the reasons, but for now - don't enjoy, just read.

/.../

How would YOU feel?

by W. Hocares

How would you feel if you came first time to United Kingdom and everything, literally everything had gone wrong?

After big promises at home you arrive to Manchester, you have precisely calculated amount of money in your pockets and you are ready to rock the world. You have left back home your wife, love of your life, and you only one year and three months old son in a hope of a better future.

After you arrive to your final destination, a little and seemingly friendly town not far from Manchester, where you supposed to have job and housing waiting, things start to go down – little by little.

Training cue is full at the work and you manage to talk yourself in when your freshly renovated house should be ready for moving in.

But it isn’t and you have to move away for some bed and breakfast that is fairly priced for your budget. Still – you didn’t count that expense back at home. And because of the location of that B&B you cannot go to work for training. Sorry – you could, but then your all your money would run out in two days for transport only.

So you’re staying for one week in the B&B and you’re spending your money eating outside because you do not have the kitchen where you could prepare your food yourself – with much cheaper costs.

Finally – after a week of waiting you return to this little town and you move into your clearly not finished house.

You manage to talk yourself into the next cue of job training – job training for the warehouse work while you have years of warehouse experiences from back home.

After the first training night you are told that you passed and all you have to do now is to wait until they put you into the work schedule and give you a call.

In a while you are trying to open a bank account but as you have no utility bills to prove your address and your interview for the National Insurance Number is weeks away, you fail. Even if you have three different identification documents for your person.

You are starting to feel a bit disturbed though you usually are most optimistic person.

And you ask: for who I need that bank account – for myself or for my apartment? My apartment does not go to work and it does not bring money to my bank account. I do that, but in the bank it feels like my accommodation is more important for the bank than I am.

So – after some days without the call from work you visit the office for enquiry and you find out that you haven’t done the second training. What the hell???

After calming yourself down you get the next training day few days ahead.

But still – no income and rent needs to be paid.

With heavy heart you pawn your really high-end laptop that even in used condition is worth more than eight hundred pounds, just for two hundred and fifty. Now you have a month to buy it back.

You pay your rent, you pass the second training and you will be waiting for another call about the schedule.

After a week you finally start working.

First salary you get for two twelve-hour shift is one hundred and twenty pounds. Your rent is eighty-five weekly.

Now worries – it will get better, you tell yourself while knowing that your younger brother had helped your family to pay their rent and food back home.

As there is little work to do at work, you get one hundred for second week.

It WILL get better!

At least you have proven yourself at work and your supervisors came to talk to you about taking you over from the agency to mother company. And even get some promotion because of your earlier skills and experiences. Just after five shifts. Nice!

Your supervisors ask you out for some relaxation the same evening. Yeah – you’re inside the circle already.

You have been in the club just for fifteen minutes when you go to the toilet. There is a security guy telling you something, but as you do not understand local accent well yet, you ask politely:

“Sorry, can you repeat that, please?” Well – you’re not sure about ‘please’, but you definitely were polite.

That damned frelling security should have thought that you were mocking him, because after totally unexpected punch you wake up in the hospital. With totally fractured nose and all you nice clothes covered with blood. Your supervisors had found you wondering unconsciously on the street and took you to Accident & Emergency.

Next day you call the police, you report the incident and day after that officer visits you at home, because you are too weak and too messed up for going constabulary yourself. They open crime case.

First week after assault you are staying home because it’s hard to open your eyes and even harder to concentrate your eyes.

In the beginning of the second week police officer leaves you a note that after checking the surveillance cameras they did not find any clues about the suspect and as the night club’s manager told that there were no incidents reported by the security, police has no leads to move further.

Sure – bathrooms have no cameras, but if there is a blood-covered man coming out from the club and security on the door does not report the incident to management, there has definitely nothing happened there.

If you ask the police about possible cover-up, they do not believe in that. Why would night club’s manager want to cover up something like this?

Really – why?

Maybe because admitting the incident would be bad for the club’s image? Maybe the incident would prove the unprofessional behaviour of their workers? Maybe the incident would even mean some fines for the club? I do not know that. I am new in United Kingdom. Do not ask me. But really – why cover up? It seems so impossible.

On the second week of your leave from work you realize that you have one week left to buy out your computer.

As you didn’t get paid for being sick and injured yet, you are starting to look out for some payday loans., only that you do not think about that as a fresh resident of the country you have no credit history and every credit check made my the loan providers lowers your credit score even more.

Now you have three days left to deadline.

Your landlord wants the rent because you haven’t been able to pay it last two weeks as you haven’t been able to work. And your doctor says you still cannot  work.

Even more – your doctor says that they have to break your nose up again because it has not grown together the way it should.

Your computer, your precious laptop is your essential working equipment as you are quite adequate graphical and web designer and a freelance writer.

And your wife calls that they need money for food and rent and diapers.

And least but not at least – you have only one pound left in your wallet and there is only half pint of milk in your freezer and you have no clue, when or where you get your next money.

Now, tell me – honestly – how would you feel after all that?

09/09/2013

W. Hocares